However, once married, they have a greater impact. There are now two of you with different opinions. The decision of either one has an effect on the other and their family.
So, how do we make decisions together when we have different opinions?
When discussing how LDS Church councils are run, President Stephen L. Richards said, “men can get together with seemingly divergent views and far different backgrounds, and under the operation of that spirit, by counseling together, they can arrive in an accord, and that accord … represents the wisdom of the council, acting under the Spirit” (quoted in Counseling with our Councils, by M. Russel Ballard, p. 44). I think the key here is that they come with the Spirit and with love for each other.
“The Spirit puts the testimony of truth in our hearts, which unifies those who share that testimony. The Spirit of God never generates contention.” (Henry B. Eyring, “That We May Be One,” General Conference, April 1998) That same Spirit helps us discuss items of importance “by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and my love unfeigned” (D&C 121:41).
Our decision making is not a competition of who is right and who is wrong. It is not a scoreboard for who gets their way. Our decisions must be made with unity. We must both agree and feel at peace with the decision.
“A unity which comes to a family or to a people softened by the Spirit will bring great power. … A man and his wife learn to be one by using their similarities to understand each other and their differences to complement each other in serving one another and those around them.” (Henry B. Eyring, “That We May Be One,” General Conference, April 1998)
We need to remember that we are working toward the same goal. We can work together to achieve those dreams.
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